There is an internal emotional ebb and flow that we each go through, that we can be acutely connected to or not. How well connected we are to our internal emotional ebb and flow will strongly influence how we respond and interact with our day to day lives.
Many clients I have worked with have wished for things to just be stable and steady, or moving in a straight line, or not to be so up and down. My understanding of what makes us all human is that we are constantly in a state of ebb and flow. We are constantly having emotional responses to our environments, the people we are close to and the people and environments we work in. There is a need for us as human beings to accept that we do have emotional responses to everyday things and allowing ourselves to experience those emotional ups and downs is a big contributor to a healthy state of wellbeing.
We have emotional responses to what we sometimes feel other people should be doing and aren’t, as well as having emotional response to particular events that happen in our day to day lives. We then as human beings work to process and understand these experiences and events by talking about those things a lot. Also ranting about how things didn’t happen in the way we feel they should have.
Underneath all of this talking is our emotional response to those experiences. If for example you had an expectation of someone at work and that expectation is not being met, and that person is not dealing with things in the way you had hoped, you can start to feel disappointed, let down, sad and/or angry. Yet, when in the midst of that dynamic it is hard to allow ourselves time to stop and ask ourselves the questions “how am I feeling about all of this” and “what can I do to support myself in this situation”. That thing to be aware of is that be allowing ourselves to acknowledge our emotions and expressing them, releases those emotions and avoids a build-up of internal emotional tension,
So importantly allowing ourselves to acknowledge the emotions we are feeling is a powerful tool in releasing those emotion. Followed by then looking at what we ourselves can do directly to support ourselves builds our confidence in our capacity to self-nurture. This enables us to have some control in the particular situation we are in. And helps us to take away that expectation of needing someone else to do something in order for us to feel better. One of my own learned experiences in life is that we can’t control how other people behave or what other people chose to do, what we can control is how we choose to interact in that dynamic and respond to their behaviour.
So for me understanding the ebb and flow of our emotions is crucial in helping us understand what is going on for us as individuals, allowing ourselves to trust in those emotional response, and to explore and consider those emotional response will enable us to make much more informed response to day to day life situations.
If you would like to get more connected to your own emotional ebb and flow, start to rate your day each day. List three emotions that you felt each day, and then why you felt that emotion. Then finally look at what you can do to support yourself around those emotions. Using these three simple steps of Explore, Release and Nurture, will enable you to become more emotionally aware and improve your overall state of emotional wellbeing.
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