How to feel better about yourself – start with these 3 simple steps.
When you’re thinking about wanting to feel better about yourself, do you feel it’s hard to know where to even start. The key point to think about is that the best point to address first before addressing anything else, is working to actively feel better about yourself from within. Address this first before or alongside thinking about external things that will help you. It’s great to feel that you look good, or that you are fit, or have plenty of things to do, but if you are not feeling it inside also, those things can begin to feel meaningless. Which is why the best place to start when wanting to feel better about yourself, is to ask yourself the question, what do I need right now and work to build up that feel good feeling for yourself from within.
“Where do I even start with that” I hear you ask? How do I go about getting to a place where I’m naturally feeling good about myself? Well it’s about having a daily practise or routine that promotes a sense of self-acceptance of yourself, includes regular self-care action steps, as well as a range of habits and practices that reflect your love of who you are as a human being. This is in essence about developing your own self-nurturing and self-soothing routines and rituals. And no these are not self-indulgent; these are essential requirements in promoting your long-term sense of overall wellbeing. Particularly within yourself and then as an extension with your life as a whole.
So have a think for a moment what behaviours or actions do you undertake on a daily basis that affirm you as an individual, that care for you and that demonstrate love of you? Do you feel you talk yourself out of doing things for you, do you put other people first, do you feel you are not entitled to do things for yourself? If you are having any of those judging or self-critical thoughts, then I am going to say to you now, you can tell those perspectives and thoughts to go take a running jump… and that from now on, you are going to bring in more things that are going to support and care for you. End of… You are important and you matter greatly.
Why self-nurture and self-sooth? As children, that was the job of our parents or guardians, and we as children where only developing our sense of self. As we become adults and develop our own sense of autonomy, and our capacity to make choices for ourselves it can take us time to begin to understand and appreciate the importance of caring and nurturing ourselves. Self-care can include a range of self-affirming and self-loving activities depending on who you are and what you are most drawn to. They can include things that help you to relax and unwind, things that let your body rest, things to support your emotional and spiritual development, strategies and rituals that help destress and rest your mind.
If you are one of those people who has that ongoing “inner critic” chatter constantly getting in the way of you making decisions that support your own wellbeing, try this following mantra, use it daily, morning and evening, while also thinking about one or two things that you could do for yourself that you would get genuine peace and enjoyment out of.
“I love and accept myself unconditionally as I am today, I accept that I’m a work in progress, I accept that when I know better, I will do better. I promise myself to care and support myself in the ways that I need on a daily basis. I make that commitment to myself as I’m fully deserving of this love and care”
So your 3 simple steps to feeling better about yourself are as follows:
- Complete the above mantra each morning and evening (saying it to yourself in the mirror is a powerful tool to use to support yourself – give it a try)
- Make a Self-Care List to include things you would like to do for yourself, choose one thing off the list each day and do that for yourself.
- Make an official commitment to yourself to care and love yourself without judgement, you fully deserve this. (Put a daily reminder in your phone to stay focused on this commitment)
As you go through this process know that if this is not something you have done on a regular basis before now, it will take a little time to settle into this new self-caring routine, with practice it will slowly become a natural and effortless part of your daily routine. So as you go through these 3 steps, take the time to take in the Mantra as you say it, listen to the words, take them in, and choose to believe in your commitment to them. You are your own best supporter. I know you can do this.
If you wish, for advice or support about your next best steps – email me directly at firstname.lastname@example.org or check my personal growth and transformation Membership Community here. Or view my website for available courses here. If you would prefer to listen to my podcast you can get the latest episodes here.
Our motto is: “Feel Good to Live Great”